The Process Is Ours

Tonight I was sharing with RunningGirl what my life was like over the last week or so. The struggles I had come across and the intensity of everything I am working through is not exactly a secret- I try to be honest and genuine on this blog. As I was telling her, she interrupted me and said, "You know, you'd never know that you were going through all this stuff by that smile on your face!"

While I know the peace I feel inside of me is temporary, I'm grateful for it. I'm grateful for each and every moment I can smile and simply be. More importantly, I'm grateful for everyone who has surrounded me, prayed for me and hugged me so that I could share my story with a smile on my face tonight. While I know that the light at the end of the tunnel is faaaaar, far away, I'm thankful for the community I have. I'm beyond blessed to have a community where I can feel safe enough to be a hot mess and know that you're right there with me- fighting for me and with me. Thank you to everyone who stepped it up and chose to walk alongside of me. I love, cherish and appreciate it more than I can say. You've made the last 10 days easier, lighter and funnier- even in the midst of the dark times.

While I don't really have anything profound to say tonight on my blog, I wanted to just share with you my moment of peace. I wanted to simply thank God for the amazing friends I have and am basking in the presence of His goodness. He is faithful...whether I see it or not.

Curls, Smash, and Gebet- Your phone calls, prayers, words of encouragement and simple gestures to let me know that you're walking this with me do not go unnoticed. Thank you so much for the gentle way you've supported me. It has made all the difference in the world.

Floss and CozyGirl- I know life hasn't been easy for you. I'm beyond honored to call you my friends. Though life has us separated at times, I know beyond a doubt you ladies have my back. Thanks for letting me blubber incoherently and then calling it a day by taking me out to a movie. I love laughing with you gals.

ElastiGirl- Life's been crazy. You always make time for me. I love love love living life with you. Thanks for talking things out with me... and for never thinking I'm crazy. It means a lot to have someone know that I'm sane. Believe me. :) Love you.

ChickenPotPie- oh man. You have stepped up in ways I didn't even know how to ask for. I'm so blessed to have you as my friend and honored to be a part of your life. Thanks for the endless ways you've carried me over the last 2 weeks... possibly over the last year ;). Though this feeling of peace is just but a moment, I know that you'll be there for me when the next tidal wave comes. Thanks for letting me be a snotty mess and still being stubborn enough the next day to want to be my friend :). Words can't even begin to describe the gratitude I have for you being you.

"We must move in faith. Don't speculate as to how things will turn out - only believe. The outcome is God's part, the process is ours."- Graham Cooke