Growing Pains

Over the last 2 weeks, I feel like I have been (and still am) at the bottom of the learning curve in LIFE.

Over the last 4 weeks, I've moved offices, houses, and started a full time job. O...M... G. Life has just been a little upside down lately. Between a new community at home, in the office and getting use to new duties, I feel like I'm up to my eyeballs with curveballs. Part of it is, for the first time in my life, I don't have someone mentoring me or intentionally investing in me since... well, ever. Part of it is, I'm allowing for insecurities to take over parts of my life (not consciously).

The insecurities I've spent the last 9 months battling don't ever go away. And I don't think that they're meant to. I don't think that my insecurities are a problem to solve, but rather a tension to manage. What I do with those insecurities will either make or break my day or week... and as proven in the last two weeks, they will make or break my relationships with others too. Denial, hiding and running from them doesn't work. If I choose to give into my insecurities and allow for take over my thoughts, I begin to doubt my instincts, friendships, and leadership skills- everything deteriorates.

The last 2 weeks have been hard, trying and real. It'll be okay. Because, at the end of the day, my friends are the ones who balance on my yoga ball listening to me whine and complain. They're the ones who buy me lattes- just because, and listen to me ramble as I incoherently stumble through my thoughts in the car on the drive home. They're the ones who give me bear hugs as I'm sobbing through a worship song... these are the things that matter. At the end of the day, I'm blessed to have amazing friends.

This is a season to keep learning, to practice being a friend- not just any kind, but a GREAT friend, to stay humble, vulnerable and confident. This is a season to get better, be better and aim higher.